A lot of people who have found themselves overweight have a common personality trait that has helped lead them there. They tend to put others before themselves. They tend to be the care takers of the world, the parents, the nurturing friend, the one who will drop everything and run to the aid of someone in need. These people like to make others happy, even if it costs them their health.
I know these types of people, because I tend to be one of them. If a friend wants to go out to dinner, we tend to drop our diet and join them. Or we skip the gym because a friend wants to go to the movies. Sometimes being a parent can have a huge affect as well, spending so much time doing for your kids, taking them places, that you just don't make the time to take care of yourself. After running from one soccer practice to a baseball game to a boy scouts meeting, you just run out of time and end up at a fast food joint for dinner. Or a friend is feeling depressed, so you go over with a pint of ice cream and a bag of chips to comfort them.
All these things happen because you are a caring person, but you must start caring about yourself too. Try this exercise with me. Right now, think of 5 people in your life that mean the most to you. Do you have all 5 figured out? Now, are YOU on that list?
Yes, I you are like me, you didn't even think to list yourself.
That needs to change, it's time to be selfish. Losing weight is an act of self-love. You must start putting yourself first. Being selfish isn't a bad thing. It is simply realizing that you must take care of yourself. You must spend quality time with your body. Hold to your guns and eat the foods you have planned for yourself and go to the gym when you planned to go. If you can learn to do that, then you will be more successful, and ultimately will be around longer to help those other people in your life.
Changing these habits and putting yourself first takes time, but he more you do it, the easier it will be. Just last night someone wanted to treat me to dinner, but I didn't have the BITES left to do that. So, I didn't do it. I made my dinner I had already planned and had him just go get his food to go and bring it back to my place. I was able to stick to my food plans AND spend quality time with my friend. These little changes in behavior really add up, and the people in your life will adjust to it, I promise.
So in closing, make yourself a priority, because being selfish is okay.